(This article was first published in the Critical Path, the monthly newsletter of PMI Sydney Chapter publish in July 2023)

If you’ve ever wanted to make an impact, win hearts, or persuade others to take action, then sharpening your skill of questioning is an absolute must. The way and type of questions you ask can truly captivate the minds and hearts of people, drawing them closer to your way of thinking. Project Managers as advocates and implementers of Change rely heavily on the power of questions to persuade their stakeholders and rally everyone towards the common goals of the project.

As the great philosopher Voltaire once said, “Judge a man by his questions rather than his answers.” Questions possess an inherent power that goes beyond their answers. When you pose a question to someone, they not only ponder the question itself but also reflect upon you, your style of inquiry, and their perception of the question’s purpose. The art of asking questions is a crucial skill that Project Managers, and indeed everyone else, should develop if they want to effectively sway people towards their vision.

Every individual holds unique values, fears, prejudices, and biases. They come from diverse cultural backgrounds and are motivated, inspired, and influenced by different things. To succeed in this complex landscape, it is essential to understand and embrace the intricacies and simplicities of the human experience. This can be achieved by truly listening and seeking to comprehend how someone arrived at their present standpoint. Once you grasp their perspective, you can meet them where they are, rather than where you desire them to be. It is from this starting point that your questions should emerge.

To truly master the art of asking questions, it is crucial to comprehend the various types and categories of questions, as well as to learn the appropriate manner and timing of posing them. Here are some ideas and strategies to help you prepare and ask engaging questions:

1. Determine the purpose of your question: Are you seeking information from the person or attempting to elicit a reaction? Do you desire a decision, a fact, or an opinion?
2. Know when to use leading questions and when to use non-leading questions:
   1. Non-leading questions aim to gather information, with the focus on the answer rather than the question. These questions help build rapport with people, as they allow them to express their viewpoints uninterrupted. However, be cautious, as non-leading questions can sometimes lead to a loss of control over the conversation. You may encounter someone who enthusiastically responds to your question and doesn’t want to stop.
   1. Leading questions, on the other hand, suggest a specific answer. These questions place the spotlight on the person asking the question, rather than the one answering it. The answer is often embedded within the question, and the respondent can either affirm or refute it. If you seek affirmation, be prepared with persuasive arguments to reaffirm the situation, or be open to changing your own opinion.
3. Exercise caution with questions beginning with ‘Why’: Such questions can unintentionally come across as judgmental, regardless of your true intentions. Asking ‘why’ may erode trust and potentially lead to a loss of control over the conversation.
4. Take the time to craft meaningful questions and listen attentively to the responses. This demonstrates your genuine desire to understand and learn at a profound level, fostering authenticity, rapport, and trust.

Asking questions creates buy-in, and buy-in produces results. The act of questioning empowers individuals. When you solicit people’s views and ideas, you send them a powerful message of belief in their abilities to contribute and effect change. By asking someone, “What could you do about this?” you are inspiring them to take ownership and leadership in the situation.

In essence, a powerful question is a catalyst for transformation. It has the capacity to ignite curiosity, spark reflective conversations, and surface underlying assumptions. It stimulates creativity, generates forward momentum, and focuses attention. Beyond its immediate impact, it touches upon a profound meaning, evoking emotions and inspiring individuals to delve deeper into their thoughts. As it unleashes a chain of further questions, it opens the door to exploration, growth, and new insights.

Furthermore, mastering the art of asking questions not only influences others but also transforms our own thinking. Often, we become trapped in our own perceptions of reality. Skillful questioning can pave the way for new awareness, insights, and perspectives. Our past experiences and beliefs about life, ourselves, others, and the world shape the boundaries of our creativity. A narrow self or world view limits our ability to envision new possibilities and generate innovative solutions. By asking questions, we can break free from our limited perception and explore new dimensions of thinking. But that’s a story for another article.

So, embrace the power of skillful questioning, and watch as the world opens up to you in ways you never thought possible.

References

Gowdy, Trey. Doesn’t Hurt to Ask, November 2020

Effective Advising in Statebuilding and Peacebuilding Contexts – How. The art of asking catalytic questions. 2015, Geneva, Interpeace-IPAT